“We Believe Each Other Into Being” from On Being w/ Krista Tippett
“We Believe Each Other Into Being”
Source: On Being w/ Krista Tippett: Jennifer Michael Hecht (Listen: 51 min)
Contributor: Selena Garcia
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“The idea that life is horrible, but absurd, and that we can embrace the weird side, and stop trying to make everything right and reasonable, stop trying to dot all the i’s or make it seem fair, but embrace the absurd, and be interested in the future…” – Jennifer Michael Hecht
This is a conversation about suicide—a non-religious, philosophical, and humane approach to an important topic. We're reminded of the importance of making suicide resistance a part of our culture and that there are secret web-like connections to each other. Sometimes when you can't see what's important about you, other people can.
While this initially aired in 2014, it's even more critical to talk about today. Philosopher, poet, and historian Jennifer Michael Hecht has "traced how Western civilization has at times demonized those who died by suicide, at times celebrated it as a moral freedom. She has struggled with suicidal places in her life and lost friends to it. And she proposes a new cultural understanding, based not on morality or on rights, and on our essential need for each other."
Having answered phones for the National Suicide Prevention Crisis Line, I’ve experienced how vital it is for this dialogue. It's also important to note that talking about suicide does not put the idea into someone's head. Those who have thoughts of suicide are usually relieved for the opportunity to speak. It lets them know they can talk to you if they're having thoughts.
If you are contemplating suicide, or if you’re worried about someone who might be, please call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255. Help is available 24 hours a day, seven days a week.
Also, check out SuicideIsPreventable.org for an easy to navigate site to know the signs, find the words, and reach out.
On Being shares the full transcript of this interview, but listening is always recommended.
“We have different moods that profoundly change our outlook, and it’s not right to let your worst one murder all the others.” – Jennifer Michael Hecht
(12:26): Dr. Hecht: “Camus said life is absurd, there’s no outer reason that you have to, but that suicide is the wrong step. That life is worth living, this absurd, strange thing should be witnessed, and it’s vital that you, essentially, have some respect for your future self, who’s going to know things you don’t know.”
(14:02) Dr. Hecht: “I will say that when I give talks, the only consistent book that people come up to me and say, this helped me, is Camus’ Myth of Sisyphus… so if they read it, it helps them save their lives. They tell me over and over. It’s remarkable.”
(14:16) Dr. Hecht: “The idea that life is horrible, but absurd, and that we can embrace the weird side, and stop trying to make everything right and reasonable, stop trying to dot all the i’s or make it seem fair, but embrace the absurd, and be interested in the future, and imagine Sisyphus happy — that’s what they get when they really read it.”
(15:43) Dr. Hecht: “But let’s also point out that a great many people who kill themselves speak about their being a burden. They’re afraid they’re a burden on other people.”
(15:55) Dr. Hecht: “Because they’ve been depressed a while, or because they’ve just had a humiliating blow, and they think very poorly of themselves at the moment. Break up of a relationship, trouble at work, but people have to know clearly, and in a simple sentence, your suicide will be a much greater burden — exponentially greater.”
(19:30) Dr. Hecht: “Don’t ever forget the flip side, which is your staying alive means so much more than you really know, or that anyone is aware of at this moment. But we’re in it together in this profound way, and you can take some strength from that. I think that’s, for me, that’s been very important. Just feel like, obviously we’re not individuals. Wow, how could I have thought that we were on that kind of level? And it’s funny, because my two arguments, that you owe it to other people and that you owe it to your future self, are both about looking at what the individual means. Because when you look at a person within a group, and all the trends we follow, the clothes, the car, the not-car, all these trends that we follow, you realize the extent to which we’re enmeshed. And when you look at yourself and realize that you have fallen in and out of love with the same person, you have fought with friends thinking you’ll never speak to them again, and then you love them again…”
(20:31) Dr. Hecht: “… we have different moods that profoundly change our outlook, and it’s not right to let your worst one murder all the others.”
LISTEN HERE (51 min)
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